The Cat's Meow

When we returned from our trip to Seattle it was clear Pumpkin the Cat was unhappy with our absence. We fed him ounces of extra love and attention. For two whole days he didn't bite or scratch us. Clearly, he was sick.

My wife dutifully carted the cat off to the vet, only to learn he had a bladder infection. She brought back a $120 bill, antibiotics and pain relievers (for the cat). While he may not have been in pain, the drugs didn't stop his constant diarrhea. Regular readers will remember that Pumpkin is not the neat and tidy ass licker.

Three days ago he pretty much stopped eating and what he ate he just vomited back up. My wife and I drew a line in the sand a long time ago about who was the poop mom and who was the throw-up mom. We were clear about the distinction, but the topic pertained to our son's bodily functions, not those of our cat. Cat vomit and diarrhea are exponentially more disgusting than anything that has thus far come from our son's body. With neither of us willing to stake a claim to a particular substance, we shared the duties.

On one occasion when the upward convulsions overtook the cat and I knew he would soon throw up, I experimented with a technique I use for Mr. Man when he is sick. The bucket. If you can't get to the bathroom, you throw up into the bucket. Since I'm not the throw up mom, I hate holding the bucket or dealing with vomit in any way, but on this particular evening, my wife had just gone out for a walk and the cat was about to hurl. So I grabbed a bowl and put it under his mouth. Turns out cats aren't like kids. In my efforts to catch the disgusting vomit and prevent yet another carpet cleanup, I followed him around with a bowl under his mouth. He just kept moving away from me until finally instead of just one pile of puke, there was a trail. Mental note: don't use the bucket method for a vomiting cat. It's futile.

Thursday morning my wife took the cat back to the vet, helpfully also a cat hospital. She proceeded to do something I didn't think we'd ever do in our life. She applied for a line of credit for pet health care. The vet anticipated no more than $800 if she ran all the possible tests.

Friday night we brought him home with a mere $250 bill and no explanation as to what made him sick. However, he's not vomiting and he's back to pooping "normally".

My wife loves to remind me that I was the one who suggested we take in the cute mewing kitty that appeared in our yard that fateful October 13th two years ago.